(Review) : Before I Go To Sleep by S.J Watson

RATING : 4.5 STARS

GENRE : Psychological Thriller / Adult 

REVIEW :

Hands down, Psychological thrillers are my absolute favorite genre. Before I go to Sleep was suggested by a good friend of mine two years ago. Since then, it has been sitting on my shelf staring at me and finally I read it. I regret for not reading it sooner. This is the type of book that I’m always on the lookout for. Watson’s debut is stunning.

Have you ever imagined being waking up without any memory of how old are you in an unfamiliar place? Sounds creepy right? yes, it is. Christine Lucas (protagonist) wakes up every morning without realizing the fact that she is 47 years old and married. The man sleeping beside her says he is her husband, but she thinks she is in her twenties or sometimes even teen. Christine finds photographs of her and her husband Ben, pasted inside the bathroom with name written on it and only after that, she trusts the man who is in bed with her. She has to go through this every day. 

Christine had an accident years ago, in which she lost her memory and now she is an amnesiac which is quite bizarre that she can only retain the memory until she goes to sleep. The only memory she could remember at all times was about her childhood. Multiple trips to doctor’s, various scan and surgery didn’t help. Moreover, Ben lost hope and doesn’t want to see her go through all the painful time in the hospital and moves her back to home. Since then, Ben takes care of Christine although he works full-time. Many doctors approached Ben for Christine’s treatment, but he starkly refused it, because he can’t see her in pain again. Ben seems to be the perfect husband and there were moments that made me feel so sorry for Ben.  

Dr.Nash approaches Christine personally, after Ben’s denial and suggests that she maintain a journal to help her remember previous activities. Christine agrees to it and also he talks her out to get treatment without Ben’s knowledge. She has been meeting Dr.Nash at his office after Ben is off to work. The idea of journal has helped Christine to know what she is going through. She gets sparks of memory in her late twenties and when she tries to focus it would fade away. Christine makes sure to record every detail onto her journal. Sometimes on reading the past events she could figure out that moment leaving out some details, it is then she realizes that her journal is really helping her and determines to find out what made her land up in her present situation and who is responsible for that.

Almost everyday, Christine asks Ben what made her lose her memory, without an exasperated feeling he would tell her it was a hit-and-run car accident and Ben with the help of police found her lying on the road,but there was no record of any witness. People came to terms that it was a car accident, since she was found on the road. Christine has a feeling that something was wrong with the accident concept. She gets glimpses of the name Adam and upon asking Ben, he would tell her that name didn’t mean anything to him. Ben tries not to upset her by telling  about their deceased son, Adam. Ben always tells Christine that they didn’t have any children. 

After several office sessions with Dr.Nash, she confirms that Adam was her son and she grapples with whom to trust. She doesn’t understand why would Ben lie to her. She is determined to ask Ben about it and eventually, she understands Ben. Who would want to hurt her while she leads a happy life with Ben? With the help of her journal and Dr.Nash, Christine is close enough to find the truth.     

In all honesty, 75% of the book was like watching a paint dry, nevertheless the mystery kept me up to read. First part of the story was Christine adapting to her situation and meetings with Dr.Nash. The story gets really interesting when she starts digging out for answers. The entire plot makes sense with last ten pages or so. The ending blew me away completely. I was cringing in shock long after finishing the book. My rating was 80% based on the ending. It’s hard-pressed for any thriller fans to not like Before I go to Sleep. If you’re someone who loves thrillers or slightly leaning towards mystery, do give it a shot. Please, try to stick to the story despite it’s initial boring part and you’ll thank me for reading it. I’m on the lookout for Watson’s sophomore novel which is expected to be out sometime this year.